“Forgiveness is the virtue of the brave,” my Instagram friend, @warith_me, quoted on his post this morning. Forgiveness is also the undoing of all stories of separation and judgment. In the Indian epic poem, The Ramanaya, Ram (God) asks Hanuman, ‘Who are you?” His answer helps us better understand the path of forgiveness in yoga. He said, “When I don’t know who I am, I serve you. When I know who I am, I am you.” Forgiveness undoes duality; it is the practice by which we come into full awareness of who and what we are. Because of our confusion, forgiveness is a an ongoing practice, one we come back to, not because it didn’t take or work the first time, but because the stilling of the mind so it remembers what it is takes intention and effort. All of our conditioning is meant to distract.
To wait for stillness to take hold is not an option, however. Action is inherent to living. So while we remember and forget and remember, we purposefully turn our actions into service, patiently forgiving ourselves for forgetting. Each time, the remembrance taking a bit more of a hold.
The day prior to my accident, Allan took us to the forgiveness bell across from the Depot Park in Gainesville. The bell is tucked away in a corner. It felt random that he pointed it out, but I sensed the importance. After he rung the bell, I did the same, four times, symbolically connecting to the four directions. As I did, I recognized myself, Allan, and David (my two sons). We were one. The resonating sound of the bell celebrated that our father-son relationship was fully mended. It was this reality that made the entire weekend an experience of bliss for me, especially the moment of the accident. I write this two weeks later with my arm now in a cast, and my heart wide open.
As I rang the bell four times, I knew all was well and all manner of things would be well. I was not proven wrong a day later. Find your forgiveness bell today. Use it to remember who you are. -carlos